Sharing a Full-time RVing Lifestyle
by Tom & Myra
Robert, Susan, Myra & Tom at Mt. Hood
I started rving about 5 yrs ago. I was newly divorced, enjoying my freedom and the beauty of traveling around this great country of ours. One of the first places I traveled to was the LOWs ranch in Deming, New Mexico. LOWs stands for Loners on Wheels, a singles RV club made up of widows, widowers, divorced and never married singles. I had fun there and learned a lot about rving from veterans of the open road.
Forming a relationship was the furthest thing from my mind. I just wanted to enjoy seeing new and exciting places. After a couple of years of traveling I started to feel something was missing. I would stand and marvel at the beauty of a National Park like Yellowstone and wish I had someone to share it with. Then I met Myra.
Myra and I had so much in common and both loved the rv full-timing life style. It didn’t hurt that she was gorgeous. I fell head-over-heels, and we moved in together to set up house. At least that’s the way I remember it.
According to Myra I showed up on her doorstep one day looking all sad eyed so she took me in. A week went by without my peeing on her living room rug, and she decided to keep me. Must have been because I begged a lot.
Now the real test of living together 24/7 began, and believe me, the one thing you better have is a sense of humor. It was like going back to school with all these new things we had to learn. Notice I said we. First, Myra had to housebreak me; I had to learn to pick things up and not just drop 'em. Myra had to learn to share closet space (a hard thing for a woman to do), but we settled in and started to enjoy each other’s company while traveling.
Everything was wonderful until our first argument. I don’t even remember what it was about now, but it taught us that we were both strongly independent people who didn’t know how to deal with solving arguments within a close relationship. After threats of splitting up, we decided it was time to sit down and talk it out. Either that or move into separate RV’s. That is, if you still had your RV. (One piece of advice I heard repeated at singles groups all over the country, and decided to ignore: "DON’T SELL YOUR RV WHEN YOU DECIDE TO JOIN UP WITH SOMEONE IN A RELATIONSHIP”).
There are a number of things that help keep a relationship strong in a small space, but they all come down to the number one most important thing - sit down and talk it out. If both of you are willing to be honest and learn about your partner and yourself, talking is a great tool. Taking a risk and putting your heart on the line will give you the greatest success.
You don’t have to sacrifice your own needs. It’s not about pleasing your partner at the expense of losing yourself. Honesty truly counts and is essential for preserving the integrity of the relationship. There is a whole give-and-take ratio you have to work out. If you're not ready for that commitment, it might be better to end the relationship altogether,or move into separate RV’s and remain friends. A relationship that is one-sided doesn’t work.
After a year we were married in Hawaii on the beach, in a very romantic setting. Marriage may not be the best for you, but it has been for us……